Last Day in New York (for now)

Monday morning. I have a 4:00 flight out of Islip airport. It's been a short trip. I look forward to coming back again because I get to see the family, and I really enjoy that. Next trip will be my sister to Jax. Then nephew and his family will hopefully be coming down to visit in-laws - and me! Then I will make my way back to NY sometime during the year.

It's been a wonderful visit, brief as it was. Friday, right from the airport, Bren and I went to Huntington and had lunch with our cousins Rene and Susan. We had a wonderful 3 hour lunch, good food, and still not enough time together! If you are in Huntington make a point of dining at F. H. Riley's. You will not be disappointed.

After lunch, Brenda and I went to what has now become one of my favorite indendent bookstores, Book Revue. It is a few blocks from Riley's, is huge, and sells new and used books. Great selection. The store is huge, comfortable, 2 floors, a small cafe inside, lots of freebie alternative newspapers. We stayed quite awhile, I bought 2 books, Bren bought 2 children's books, and then we headed home. We got in at 5:30. 6 hours after my flight landed in Islip.

More later and more photos later.

Themes

I noticed early in my life that each year has a theme. It's as if there was an outline that my life was following. I don't believe in fate, so I don't believe my life is preordained by anything other than my previous and current karma. Still, while in high school I realized that years ending in an odd number were more difficult, i.e., painful, and at times, life threatening; always at my own hand, the result of poor decisions I made in this life. I absolve myself of the events prior to my teens, as I had not enough control of my circumstances in my life to have been consciously responsible for those harrowing incidents. Since my mid teens, I have had to live the consequences of decisions I consciously made.

The years when I found my life "crashing" were followed by a year or years of clean up and recovery. 2009 was a year of crashing, but not life threatening. More like eye-opening. More cathartic in a subtle, emotional way. It is said that dealing with ourselves is like peeling an onion. My onion has been peeled further. This past year was a year of taking a long hard look at me, my relationships with others and my relationship to myself. It was a year of decisions. Hard choices.

Having made some decisions, 2010 is a year to take action on those decisions. I'd be lying by omission if I didn't say that I was scared. Not frightened -- SCARED. Nonetheless, ACTION is my theme for this year. Given that I have made some poor choices in the past, I have been diligent in internally exploring the right choices, for the right reasons, and at the best time for my life.

Buddhism has taught me that the only thing I can control is my own decisions and actions. I cannot control others, I cannot control circumstances in the world or in my immediate environment. So I will take the actions I can take and work toward getting more control of me.