Politics & News

Try as I might, I can't seem to turn my eye and concentration away from the world of politics. Sometimes I long to live in a world (again) where it takes weeks to find out who was elected president, or that there was a war or disaster somewhere. Television and 24 hour a day news stations have brought now from remote places in the world into my now. I try not to look. I try to turn away. It's so hard for me to do. It's as if I were looking away while it was happening right in front of me. I can't do it. Yet.

It's not just that I have to keep looking that troubles me. It's what I think and feel while I'm looking. Yes, I know I am being manipulated by the media. I know they show us only the most terrible, inflammatory news. Knowing this doesn't prevent me from getting frightened, angry, overwhelmed or disillusioned. Disillusioned is the feeling that I feel most frequently, especially in regards to Iraq, Iran, N. Korea and the Bush Administration. Frightened? Yes, very. Angry? yes, very. Overwhelmed? Yes, very. Disillusioned? Completely.

Then, today, in my emailbox appears a quote from Thomas Merton that is just what I needed to hear:

“It is true, political problems are not solved by love and mercy. But the world of politics is not the only world, and unless political decisions rest on a foundation of something better and higher than politics, they can never do any real good for men. When a country has to be rebuilt after war, the passions and energies of war are no longer enough. There must be a new force, the power of love, the power of understanding and human compassion, the strength of selflessness and cooperation, and the creative dynamism of the will to live and to build, and the will to forgive. The will for reconciliation.”

From Introductions East & West. The Foreign Prefaces of Thomas Merton (Unicorn Press, Inc. Greensboro, NC 1981) Page 105

It often looks as though our country is gearing up for another war - a war with Iran. The pre-war buzz words are out there again, just like they were before the U.S. invaded Iraq. I can pray with love and compassion for the players to make the right decisions. That's all I can do.

I remember listening to a teaching by Bardor Tulku Rinpoche once and he was answering a question about why the world was so awful. He said that the majority of crime, whether one on one, or mass genocide, was perpetrated by a very small number of people. He explained that the large majority of people live peaceful, kind lives. That is the heartening truth o the world. That is the news that isn't told.

Ya Gotta Have Friends

One of my favorite Bette Midler songs is "Friends." It's a bitter sweet song but hopeful. I always prefer hopeful.

And I am all alone.
There is no one here beside me.
And my problems have all gone.
There is no one to deride me.

But you got to have friends.
The feeling's oh so strong.
You got to have friends
to make that day last long.

I had some firends but they're gone,
somethin' came and took them away.
And from the dusk 'til the dawn
here is where I'll stay.

Standing at the end of the road, boys,
waiting for my new friends to come.
I don't care if I'm hungry or poor,
I'm gonna get me some of them.

'Cause you got to have friends.
Da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, friends.
That's right you, oh you, yeah you,
I said you gotta have some friends,
I'm talkin' about friends, that's right, friends.
Friends, friends, friends.

I had some firends, oh, but they're all gone, gone,
someone came and snatched them away.
And from the dusk until the very dawn, you know,
here is where I gotta stay, here is where I gotta stay.

And I'm standing at the end of a real long road
and I'm waiting for my new friends to come.
I don't care if I'm hungry or freezin' cold,
I'm gonna get me some of them.

'Cause you gotta have friends,
that's right, friends, friends.
I gotta me my, I gotta me my, I gotta me my,
look around and see all of my friends.
Oh, friends, that's right, friends, friends,
friends, friends, friends, friends, oh,
friends, you gotta have friends . . .

I am often preoccupied with figuring out how I'm going to get enough "alone time." There are times when it's a mantra. I find that when I get time to be alone I am usually quickly sated and happy to back among my friends and family. While I would love to be the kind of person who could go to the Himalayas and live in a cave for the rest of my life, I am not that person. The dharma tells us, too, to seek friends:

Find a friend to be with and stay in that relationship, avoiding the dangers of hurting others. Stay with your friend and become mindful and joyful. If you can find no friend, then go on by yourself. Better to carry on alone than live with the foolish. Journey on alone, unconcerned, working no evil, like the bull elephant in the jungle. -Sunnata Vagga

I'm a person who needs people in life. Quality always above quantity. When I was younger quantity was far more important. It hasn't been for a long time now. I have a handful of good friends now. The quality of these friendships is rich and deep. In many ways, far deeper for me than ever before.

I find myself being more open and honest about my life and feelings. It's always been hard for me to share the little thoughts, the little things that occupy my time and mind. For some reason it has always seemed to me that the little things reveal who you really are. As they say, the devil is in the details. But I'm, (YIKES!!!!), allowing people to know more about the little things about me and it's getting less scary all the time.

Wisely Selfish

From His Holiness, The XIVth Dalai Lama:

...it is extremely important to look inward and try to promote the right kind of attitude, which is based on awareness of reality. A sense of caring for others is crucial. And it is actually the best way of caring for oneself. ...the moment you think of others, this automatically opens our inner door--you can communicate with other people easily, without any difficulties. The moment you think just of yourself and disregard others, then because of your own attitude, you also get the feeling that other people also have a similar attitude toward you. That brings suspicion, fear. Result? You yourself lose inner calmness. Therefore, I usually say that although a certain kind of selfishness is basically right--self and the happiness of that self are our original right, and we have every right to overcome suffering--but selfishness that leads to no hesitation to harm another, to exploit another, that kind of selfishness is blind. Therefore, I sometimes jokingly describe it this way: if we are going to be selfish, we should be wisely selfish rather than foolishly selfish.

I feel that the moment you adopt a sense of caring for others, that brings inner strength. Inner strength brings us inner tranquility, more self-confidence. Through these attitudes, even though your surroundings may not be friendly or may not be positive, still you can sustain peace of mind.

The Art of Peace: Nobel Peace Laureates Discuss Human Rights, Conflict and Reconciliation by the Dalai Lama and other Nobel Laureates, edited by Jeffrey Hopkins, published by Snow Lion Publications

Surrender

A while back I wrote a blog on being stuck on stupid. I admitted in that blog that I sometimes get stuck on stupid. I think recently I have been stuck on stupid again.

I don't always want to deal with things. Especially difficult feelings. I think that if I hold them in they will go away, or I will feel differently or they will matter less. None of that is true. It never goes away, my feelings don't change and until I let go of it, it won't go away.

I'm trying to walk a path in my life. A Buddhist path that is lit by compassion and patience. Compassion and patience go hand in hand. I don't think they can be separated; you can't have one without the other. It's a most difficult path for me. Perhaps the most difficult path I could have chosen.

I am not compassionate or patient by habit. I'm the opposite and must frequently remind myself to be patient or compassionate. I often fail in this. I keep trying to get up after each fall. Sometimes I'm just too tired. I'm tired from walking around with lots of difficult stuff I don't want to deal with. Too tired to be patient. Too tired to work toward compassion. Too tired of me.

That's where stuck on stupid comes in. I keep this circle going. I keep doing it over and over again. Sometimes the circle is wider, sometimes it's narrower, but it's always a circle.

I'd like to give up. I won't give up plodding along this path. I want to give up holding on so tight to things that prevent me from achieving the patience and compassion I want to live. It's about surrender. So hard for me to do. No matter how many times in my life I've had to do it, and I've been brought to my knees on a number of occassions, it doesn't get easier.

Don't Watch

I was watching a program on the origins of the archaelogical phenomena created by the ancients. The speculation was that these monumental structures and land maps were built by and/or for extra terrestials.

A few days later I watched a program on asteroids hitting the earth. The focus of this show was that an asteroid was responsible for the annihilation of dinosaurs and other prehistoric beings. The show also speculated on a future asteroid hitting the coast of southern California and its horrific aftermath. The bet was that the human species would survive because we are resilient and plentiful.

As I sat there I just kept thinking about what the purpose of life is. Not just life, but my life. Why am I here? Why am I here now? Have I been here before? Am I doing what I'm supposed to be doing? Is there such a thing as "supposed to"?

I thought about the civilization our society has developed. I thought about the way we have structured our values and how we spend our time on earth. I thought about how ludicrous the way we live is. I thought about how long I'd been asking these questions and how long I've not had definitive answers.

While the questions are valid, they are mostly rhetorical. No one has the answer. Some people believe they do, but those answers are based soley on faith. That would be easy to buy into if there weren't so many faiths, with so many different answers. The most common information given by religions is how to live on this earth, not why we live on this earth.

While I am not a believer in creationism, I'm not sure that Darwinism is the only other viable option. Not that I have any theories myself, I'm not that smart. But there are many smart people now and there have been many more in the past yet the only two theories that are still standing are creationism and evolution.

If there's a purpose to this blog it may be an advisory not to watch pseudo-documentaries that remind me that no one has the answers.


Above artwork by Kelli Bickman: blue buddha
30x66 acrylic on paper
blessed by H.H. the XVIIth Karmapa

"It Was 39 Years Ago Today...

...Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play."

It's hard for me to believe it is 39 years ago since I first heard this album. But it is, Blanche. Oy, I'm getting old!

I love this album, still. And I loved it when it came out. In a word, what distinguished this music from other music was that it was deep. The songs were creative, not just boy/girl I love you.

There was Within You, Without You, a thoughtful and philosophical song with Indian instuments and influence; Lovely Rita, a love song about adults; A Day In The Life, almost epic in it's length and the stories told; She's Leaving Home, a teenage lament thought to be about an abortion; and the title song, a real catchy rocking tune.

I loved all the songs. They were so original, so different than anything else being done at the time. It was a work of art, not just a product.

I couldn't let the day go by without recounting a fond joyous memory of my youth.