Thanksgiving

"Let us rise up and be thankful,
for if we didn’’t learn a lot today,
at least we learned a little,
and if we didn’’t learn a little,
at least we didn’’t get sick,
and if we got sick,
at least we didn’’t die;
so, let us be thankful."
~The Buddha

Yes, I’m thankful to be alive, and certainly, as in Buddhist tradition, I am thankful to have been born human. (I might want to come back next time as Christie’s little son teckel, who lives an adored and envious life.)

• I’m thankful for many things.
• I’m thankful for my partner, Frankye, and our home
• I’m thankful for my extended family, Christie, Sue, Lori, Lin and Clio
• I’m thankful to still have my parents and siblings, and their families
• I’m thankful for the animals that live with me and live around our home
• I’m thankful for the job I have, the people we serve, the integrity of my co-workers
• I’m thankful for having been born and live as a free American
• I’m thankful that all my physical needs are met and my desires as well
• I'm thankful to have found the Buddhist path and have a Sangha with whcih to practice
• I’m thankful that I have the capacity to learn and live a better life because of it
• I’m thankful for the art that stimulates my mind
• I’m thankful for the music of the Beatles, which delights my ears and warms my heart
  

So, it’s Thanksgiving and I’m thankful, dammit! Now leave me alone.

Holiday

This week begins the 6 week long holiday season. I say six weeks because it begins now with Thanksgiving and ends the second week in January. In between is Thanksgiving, my father's birthday, Taylor's birthday, Christmas eve, New Year's Eve, Buddhist First Light, Frankye's birthday and finally, Lori's Birthday on January 9th. Whew! But no need to get frazzled about it. I love the holidays and I'm sure Frankye and I will enjoy these holidays very much.

This week we will travel to Delray Beach to spend Thanksgiving with my family. My sister, her husband, my niece and her son, my nephew and his girlfriend, my brother and his family, a whole bunch of people I love and don't get to see enough will be there. Friday we will see Lin and Clio and have plans to spend a good deal of time at the casino in Hollywood. Saturday has not yet been firmed up but Brenda leaves that day so I'm sure I'll be with her til then, and then Franlye and I will leave early Sunday morning. We are staying at a motel so there will be refuge from the masses of people, mostly for Frankye. The best part for me? Spending time with Brenda. She's just about the best medicine around for me and I miss her. I haven't seen her since April of 2004 and I will just soak her up.

This Christmas, Frankye and I will host our 4th annual Christmas eve dinner. I haven't decided on the menu yet but I'm leaning toward southern rather than Italian. I may poll some of the ten guests and see what their preference is before settling on it. I enjoy the preparation for this evening as much as I enjoy the event. It's made the holiday much more enjoyable since we began celebrating in this way. It gives us a chance to do something else on Christmas day and that usually means going to a movie or just staying in and relaxing.

I like the holiday season and it is upon us. The only thing that throws me about it is that it came around so fast. Another year gone by -- and so quickly!

Thomas Merton Still Vital After All These Years

“We have to recognize that a spirit of individualism and confusion has reduced us to an ethic of ‘every man for himself and the devil take the hindmost.’ This ethic, unfortunately sometimes consecrated by Christian formulas, is nothing but the secular ethic of the affluent society, based on the false assumption that if everyone is bent on making money for himself the common good will automatically follow, due to the operation of economic laws.

An ethic of barely disguised selfishness is no longer a Christian ethic. Nor can we afford to raise this to the national level and assume that the world will adjust itself if every nation seeks its own advantage before everything else. On the contrary, we are obliged to widen our horizons and to recognize our responsibility to build an international community in which the right of all nations and other groups will be respected and guaranteed. We cannot expect a peaceful world society to emerge all by itself from the turmoil of a ruthless power struggle – we have to work, sacrifice and cooperate to lay the foundations on which future generations may build a stable and peaceful international community. Every Christian is involved in this task, and consequently every Christian is obliged to seek information and form his conscience so that he may be able to contribute his own share of intelligent political action toward this end.” - From Peace in the Post-Christian Era, by Thomas Merton. Orbis Books; Maryknoll, New York. 2004. p.92-93.

Thomas Merton died in 1968 and yet his words were never truer than they are today. In the 37 years since his death this ethic of selfishness in an affluent society has been raised to the national level and with the birth of the European Union and capitalist China has spread to other continents, as well.

• How did we, America, get where we are today?
• How do we have a President, as well as a climate, that espouses conservative Christianity yet is so far removed from what Jesus taught as to be unrecognizable as Christ-like?
• How do we have a President who mistakes political debt as political capital that he has earned?
• How do we have a President and a majority ruled Senate and Congress that would rather offer American and Iraqi lives to slaughter than to admit that this war was a mistake?
• How do we have an American citizenry that is so wrapped up in consumption that it can't do anything but work and compete against it's neighbors and fellow citizens, the great antidote to political awareness and activity?

I have no answers. I only have questions, and bewilderment, and confusion. I seek out understanding and I have a desire for a life with more meaning and less possessions, but I rarely succeed. My only recourse is my brain, my voice and my vote. They, too, are over taxed in an effort to keep-up and earn future security. Seeing and being the rat on the treadmill is one thing. Getting off the treadmill is another.

Leaving NC

Second to the last day of vacation. It went so fast and seemed so long at the same time. I'm always surprised at how long I feel the anticipation of a future vacation, and how quickly I get over being on vacation. I'm usually ready to get back to work after a week. I miss the dogs, my house, my routine, my job.

This has been a good vacation for me. Not always comfortable or comforting. The quiet and serenity of the mountains gave me an opportunity to stop and do a self-assessment. Very timely, as I also had my 54th birthday while we were away. I have to say I didn't always like what I found and saw about myself. One day in my journal my only comment was...everywhere I look I see only my own self-loathing. Kind of a play on the Hindu saying, "Everywhere I look I see only my own desires." I'll be writing more about this in future posts. It's been good for me to do this and go through this and to make some decisions about the course of my life.

Today we are in Atlanta. We are going to the High Museum to see the Andrew Wyeth restrospective. I'm not a big fan of respresentative art but I was touched and impressed by his Helga paintings that I viewed some 10 years ago with friend Lee at the Norton Gallery of Art. I think I'm more open to figurative art right now. Maybe it's the influence of learning Thangka painting. Not sure. I'm looking forward to seeing the exhibit, and looking forward to getting back home tomorrow.

- photos of NC and Kess and Frankye © 2005 by C.Cripps
- "Braids", 1979 Artist: Andrew Wyeth Medium: Tempera on Masonite © AM Art, Inc Image Courtesy: The Mint Museums

Vacation

Sapphire, NC

Vacation is a wonderful thing. So good to get away from the drudge of everyday life.

I am a creature of habit, and I get more so as I get older. I’m not comfortable with change. It’s difficult for me. It makes me pay attention. I’d rather not pay attention. I’d rather be on auto pilot and just space out most of the time. That is not the Buddhist way. Maybe that’s why I’m attracted to Buddhism. It challenges me.

Going on vacation forces me to pay attention. The environment is different, sounds, smells, colors, air quality, light, foods, everything is different than what I am accustomed to. It breaks through my glazed over awareness and demands my attention. It screams at me to notice, notice or fall off the mountain.

The house we are staying in is quite beautiful and comfortable. It’s spacious, bright, deep set into the mountains of western NC, and engulfed with Autumn foliage colors. The weather is mid 60's by day and mid 40's by night. Last night we had a fire in the fireplace. It was lovely.

I celebrated my 54th birthday here on Saturday. It was very pleasant. Good friends, pizza, birthday cake with crayon candles, a beautiful environment, and quiet. Also got some great gifts.
Today is Monday and the four of us are going to venture out into the mountains of NC. I’m a little nervous about it because in order to get to the house you have to drive down this incredibly steep driveway. The area to park the car is small. If the car didn’t stop and continued to move as you reached the flat part then you would go off a 15-20 foot drop, hopefully to be stopped from barreling down the mountain by trees. Looking around yesterday I noticed no cars that had done that, nor any scars on the environment indicating that someone had succumbed to such a scary occurrence. So, while it looks frightening, traveling up and down this driveway safely in an automobile is quite doable. I’m posting some pictures that I took from the deck yesterday. It’s really a lovely house. More photos are available at: House in Sapphire Valley.

Enough is Enough

I sent the following email message to Senators Bill Nelson and Mel Martinez of Florida, Senators Clinton and Schumer of NY, Senator Kerry of MA and Senator Reid of Nevada and urged them to seek the truth and restore integrity to the American political process.


Dear Senator Nelson,

Halleluah!!!

I am so pleased that Democratic leader, Senator Harry Reid, invoked Senate Rule 21 and dragged the majority party, huffing and puffing, into closed session.

It is about time the democratic minority in the senate took the offense instead of the defense. I agree with Sen. Reid, that Republican stalling and obstructionist behavior to hide the truth behind the fallacy of the Iraq war is a slap in the face to the American people.

Senator John Kerry, during his campaign, said that these people, the current administration, were some of the most corrupt, lying people around. His comments have never been more true than what we have witnessed since 9/11, the lies about WMD and the refusal of Republicans to investigate anyone in the administration for the lies told to the American people.

In my opinion, this is Cheney's war and he and Karl Rove are the guilty designers of the war and the whole Valerie Plame debacle.

Enough is enough with these guys. It is time that INTEGRITY be restored to the American democatic process and it's clear that Republicans do not have that as their goal. It is up to the Democrats in power to restore democracy.

I urge you to urge other members of the Senate to stay on the case of these scoundrels that have abducted our Republic and bring to the light of day the whole truth about why Americans are dying on Iraqi soil.

Sincerely,

My Belief System

My own faith system is a constantly evolving, major part of my life formulated by a life long search for answers to questions about origin and meaning. I learned in grammar school that people believed the earth was flat, that scientists based theories on that belief and then speculated truths based on that assumption. Like a house of cards, what was taught as truth fell when the first assumption was incorrect. I realized that everything taught was suspect and needed to be examined carefully. Growing up as a cradle Catholic I was given answers that made no sense and weren’t logical in the most simple ways. I was never satisfied with those answers. Church law is not a good enough reason for me to believe something that does not make sense to me.

I know that I do not believe in the God of my upbringing. I believe that I am not the greatest power alive. I believe there is a greater power than myself though it takes no shape or form that I can comprehend at this time. Having said that, I think anything is possible, including the existence of the God of my upbringing. I believe there was an historical Jesus, although I do not believe he was divine. He may well have been a completely enlightened being. I believe that Jesus was a teacher, a radical and enlightened thinker, and a seeker of truth. I revere him for those reasons. I believe there have been other highly realized, enlightened beings including the Buddha and Ramakrishna as well as many, many others unknown to me.

I respect the spiritual in others, regardless of how that manifests itself. It is not for me to judge whether or not a belief system, a ritual, or a spiritual tradition is valid for others. I am only concerned with being able to live peacefully with my own beliefs.

My beliefs include love and compassion in action. The teacher is not more important than the truth taught. I believe that life is the most valuable resource humanity has and how we treat the less fortunate and least known to us as well as the most affluent and known is love and compassion in action.

My beliefs are based on an inner resolve to contribute to humanity at large and not be part of the burden of humanity. I believe that I alone can change and control me, and I'm barely able to do that at times. I do not believe that outside laws, whether religious or secular, can control me. My belief system is internally based and driven, with external manifestations of those beliefs in how I am in the world with others.

I have an attraction for ritual and demonstrative expressions of my beliefs. It is important to me to fully participate in a faith system in order to learn and absorb the beliefs of that system. I think rituals are an important way to reinforce and remind ourselves of our primary concerns in this life. It is so easy, too easy, to get lost in the details of living and culture. I need reminders on a daily basis that I have a more meaningful purpose than running the race everyday. It is also important to me that my faith be a part of my life every single day, not just on the Sabbath. One of the things I like about Buddhism is that you are encouraged by the teachings of the Buddha to not take his word for it, but to instead, examine your own experience and draw your own conclusions.

The more I learn and process what I learn, the more my beliefs are honed to a clear, simple vision of what I believe. I was always somewhat frightened of "cleaning house." I think I feared there would be nothing there if I cleaned out the clutter of my beliefs. I am very pleased at not only what is there, but at how clear and strong it is.