October 31, 2007

Memorable Photos

I still have no time to write but I have a few minutes to post some photos. All were taken by my friend C. Cripps.


His Holiness the Dalai Lama in Centennial Park in Atlanta GA giving a public talk. He is waiting to be introduced.



His Holiness speaking to the crowd of thousands on a rainy day.













Clio and I and Christi and I hanging out at Clio's loft.











This was a most memorable experience. Having Frankye, and Christi and of course, Clio, with me there made it VERY special. I feel I haven't taken it all in yet. I felt so much emotion during the weekend that it was hard to feel calm and take in all that was taught. I think this was the most generous gift I have ever been given and I can't thank my friend Christi enough for that. When I can I will dowload the teachings that have been posted by Emory and listen again to His Holiness' teachings.

October 15, 2007

The Merton Reflection for the Week of October 15, 2007

My own peculiar task in my Church and in my world has been that of the solitary explorer who, instead of jumping on all the latest bandwagons at once, is bound to search the existential depths of faith in its silence, its ambiguities, and in those certainties which lie deeper than the bottom of anxiety. In these depths there are no easy answers, no pat solutions to anything. It is a kind of submarine life in which faith sometimes mysteriously takes on the aspect of doubt when, in fact, one has to doubt and reject conventional and superstitious surrogates that have taken the place of faith. On this level, the division between Believer and Unbeliever ceases to be so crystal clear. It is not that some are all right and others are all wrong: all are bound to seek in honest perplexity. Everybody is an Unbeliever more or less! Only when this fact is fully experienced, accepted and lived with, does one become fit to hear the simple message of the Gospel-or any other religious teaching.

The religious problem of the twentieth century is not understandable if we regard it only as a problem of Unbelievers and of atheists. It is also and perhaps chiefly a problem of Believers. The faith that has grown cold is not only the faith that the Unbeliever has lost but the faith that the Believer has kept. This faith has too often become rigid, or complex, sentimental, foolish, or impertinent. It has lost itself in imaginings and unrealities, dispersed itself in pontifical and organization routines, or evaporated in activism and loose talk.

Thomas Merton. "Apologies to an Unbeliever" in Faith and Violence. South Bend, IN: University of Notre Dame Press, 1968: 213-214.

A good weekend. Sangha on Saturday morning, an enriching experience, as always. Good home time with F. I rented 2 movies on Saturday and we watched both Georgia Rule and Thief of Time. We liked them both. Sunday I did some houswork. It took several hours but it has really helped get the house back in control. F spent good time organizing the kitchen. She did good and it adds to the feeling of things in control. Last night we watch the Milarepa DVD. It was quite good.

This coming week is special. C is coming on Fri, I think in time for she and I to have lunch together (maybe at India Restaurant), and then spend the evening together. Saturday morning we 3 head out early to go to Atlanta. We will see Clio (YEAH!) and attend events Sat, Sun, and Mon related to H.H. Dalai Lama's visit to Emory University. Sat night we will attend the Tibetan Mystical Arts performance. Sun morning we will attend a teaching by His Holiness to Buddhist practitioners and then Mon afternoon we will attend the public talk in Centennial Park. We will return to Jax on Tues. It may be the only time in my life to see His Holiness. He is aging and has announced his coming retirement, though he has given no date. What a gift to see him. A special gift from C who is making it all possible. Exciting stuff!

I am still reading Karma Chakme's Mountain Dharma and really, really learning a lot. Some tidbits...

Buddha cannot remove your karma. Only you can remove your karma in reliance upon Buddha.

The only point of studying buddha-nature is to be inspired to practice Dharma, because it is the practice - not the knowledge - that reveals our buddha-nature and enables us to obtain buddhahood.

No one shapes us except our own afflictive emotions - our attachment, anger, ignorance, pride, jealousy and greed.


There is a long chapter on karma that is the most detailed explanation and description of cause and effect I have ever read. It is quite good.

I haven't done any artwork lately, and it's ok. I am journaling, and reading, and enjoying my favorite television programs. I am reading mysteries, and dharma, and meditating, and praying, and attending sangha, working, and feeling well balanced. Homelife has been very good. F and I have found a place where mutual respect and common courtesy rules and it is very easy going. Something we haven't always been successful at. But we are now and that is what matters and what we need to remember that we know how to do.

October 12, 2007

What a week! I had a wonderful trip to my sister's. I spent time with her, that we haven't had together in a long, long time. She is the best medicine in my world. I love her dearly. I met and spent time 4 days in a row with my new grand-nephew, Conner. He is BEAUTIFUL and such a good baby.

I spent time with my niece Diana and my other grand-nephew, Zack! He's 4 now and smart, and beautiful, and well-mannered. Diana has a hard way to go but she does right by her son. It takes a lot of courage and hard work to do that as a poor, single mother.

I also got to watch the Yankees lose the playoffs to the Cleveland Indians. It didn't matter to me that they lost, it was just so good to watch Yankee games. I love baseball.

I went to work yesterday and then right to KTC for a board meeting. We met until 10 and I'm tired today. I am so glad I decided to not step away from the board at this time. I really wanted to. But I needed to stay and I'm so glad I did.

more later

October 2, 2007

If I had better knees...and it wasn't pouring rain outside...and I wasn't sitting at my desk at work...I'd skip down the street. I'm so excited that at this time 2 days from now I will be in a jet flying up the east coast to NY. I will have 5 full days with my sister and I am thrilled about it.

I have really been feeling like getting away for a little bit. Aside from a few trips to my parent's home (which are never stress-free) I haven't been away since the trip to NM in April. That was such a wonderful trip. I not only have fond memories of the trip and the time there with F, C, and Q, but I have a longing to go back - a longing that is deeper than my original desire to see NM.

I haven't been to my sister's since April 2004. I went for my nephew's wedding. It was a wonderful weekend, but crowded with lots of family and activities. The time before that was as a surprise to my sister for her 50th birthday. Again, a short trip stuffed with family and activities. This trip is planned around no family reunions, celebrations or rituals. I will visit with other family, like our newest member Conner, but aside from that, Bren and I will hang out and rest. I'm bringing 2 novels, a dharma book, and a couple of mags. We'll talk for hours and hours, eat healthy meals, sleep in, enjoy the yard (beautifully landscaped by my brother-in-law) and weather, and visit Conner (more than once, I'm sure).

When I return we will be home for 2 weeks when C arrives and we travel to Atlanta to see His Holiness the Dalai Lama at Emory University. As if that wasn't the best of the best, Clio will also be there and we will spend time with her. We'll then be home another 10 days when we fly to Maryland to spend some time with C & Q at their new home. F has been there already, and loved it, but this will be my first time. I will celebrate my 56th birthday while there. The trip is a generous birthday gift from C & Q. So much good stuff to look forward to.

I've have worries, too. I'm worried about my friend Laura, who recently lost her dad. I haven't seen or talked to her and I don't want to infringe on her privacy. F and I drove by their house the other day to see if they were in, but they weren't. She will resurface when she is ready, but I miss her and know this is a sad, difficult time for her.

I'm worried about the trees around the house continuing to fall and the damage they will do. Last Wednesday, a neighbor's tree broke and fell on our fence and knocked down a portio of the fence and crushed the gates far beyond repair. It's been raining most days since then and we haven't been able to buy replacements and fix it until we had the tree and trunk removed. We were blocked on the property unable to take our cars out but gradually have had the tree cut up and removed. Today after work I am going to Home Depot to purchase a new gate and F and I will put it up tonight or tomorrow night. What I really fear is one of the big old oaks that surround the house will fall on the house and create a disaster. It is with sadness that I look back on the days of carefree apt. living.

I'm worried about the health and well-being of my teacher and pray for his return to good health and a long life.

I have other worries, too, but nothing that couldn't be cured by some home made Skotch broth and fresh pressed apple cider! Hmmmmm, I wonder where I could get some of that.....